life, the universe, and donna

Fuck. That about sums it up.

This evening is totally full of fail. So, Monday night is my study night. Good thing, as I have a midterm on Thursday, so my goal was to study (with short 10-15 minute breaks every hour) pretty much from the moment I got home (well, I let myself have half an hour to build furniture, write a blog post, and be an ass on livejournal) until Nick gets home. So far, have studied for maybe 40 minutes. Am not even through Part 1 of bone, and still need to go over muscle, joints, nervous system, & endocrine system before Thursday evening. Planned on studying on Wednesday as well, but now methinks Tuesday is going to be a write off. And my commutes on Tuesday, Thursday & Wednesday. And lunch breaks. God damn.

Why did I not study? And for that matter, why am I not studying right now? Because this evening has been Total Epic Fail.

So I was doing pretty well, and decided to take a short break to go make dinner. I was making one of my infamous “leftover crap in a pan” bizarro meals, and was in the midst of adding everything in my fridge into a frying pan. Found a couple of eggs, thought hey! Eggs! Eggs go well with rice and random shit! Why not? (Have no veggies other than veggies from soup and such, so egg isn’t as weird as it might be. Or maybe it is. Whatever, I can’t cook, and I don’t have much in the way of taste anyway.)

Anyway, cracked egg, started to pour in, and holy mother of hell: It’s black. BLACK. I’m not even remotely exaggerating. The yolk was still yellowy, but all the rest of the non-yolk shit was SOLID BLACK.

I had a moment of insanity seeing half the contents of my fridge sitting in a pan with GROSS BLACK EGG, thinking I could maybe scrape it out, but then the smell hit me with the force of a thousand frying pans to the head. Yeah, no. Not even my incredible dislike for wasting food was going to save this one.

So, I went into the livingroom where there was a black garbage bag full of Ikea detrius. I scraped the food into an interm bag, then went to add it to the big black bag… and hey, it’s leaking? Weird, why is there anything liquid in there at all? I peek into the bag and hey look, that’s what happened to that mostly-empty jug of bleach we never use! Shitballs! Aaand there is now bleach all over the floor, and a curious black dog who seems to think bleach is fascinating, and hey can I smell that some more you’re so interested it must be really really great right? NO DOG GO UPSTAIRS RIGHT NOW.

Luckily, floors are concrete and difficult to damage any further than they are already damaged. At worst, there will be a spot near the couch that is slightly cleaner than the rest of our rather damaged (and, admittedly, grungy) floors, but can’t bring myself to care. It’ll grunge up soon enough I’m sure.

Anyway, after all that, I’m hungry and my back hurts from scrubbing the floor to make sure there isn’t even a HINT of bleach left on the floor for the dog to lick up (would be her way of getting me back for making her wear the wig, I’m sure), and I’m absolutely revolted at the thought of gross black egg and there’s no fucking food left in my house, and and and…

Damnit all to hell. I can’t look at my textbook, BRAIN IS FULL OF GROSS BLACK EGG.

Ok. I feel better now. Gross black egg notwithstanding… I think I have a tv dinner or some such garbage somewhere. I will eat that. And I will study bone. And I will stop making That Face Like I Just Poured Black Egg Into My Dinner.

BLACK. EGG.